When the melody goes mute...

ok.. i like alliteration.. its very obvious.. yeah.. juvenile phrasing.. ok
SO.. i normally write once a day, but im starting to love it so much, i just have to write again. It started with all those poems n 'essays' (if thats wat they are) that were written when i was going through some tough times. I re-read them n i sorta laugh at me. It seems so stupid. But im human. Everyone goes through it. Some write about it. Anyway, since it started that way, i thought i write only when im depressed or something.. but i realised.. i write when im overwhelmed with emotion.. im attatched to it now.. i love it! i dont read.. but writing is an expression. like music. only easier to understand though..
Today, after like MONTHS.. i danced in the bathroom.. i know there are many ppl who do it, its one of those feel-good things.. especially if you're doing for the 1st time after a really rough time. 'rough' is an understatement. make that depressing, lonely, foolish.. ah, i dont want to get there.
So it was me and the shower.. nice warm water on a chilly night.. music playing nice n loud.. itunes on shuffle.. me singing.. ok shouting.. when i knew the words.. n just dancing like a maniac when i dint.. the mother got bugged that i took so friggin long in there.. but heck, it was awesome.. i felt so happy..
another would be christmas night.. went to church on 24th night and a party after that.. 1st time that dad let me go out with friends after church at night WITHOUT a curfew.. was a lil depressing now n then but i had fun.. Then i woke up early to visit my grandmother (nana) in the hospital.. we gave her perfume, nailpoilishes n lipsticks for christmas.. n i opened it for her n she was so happy.. Even better, i painted her toenails n put lipstick on her lips, sprayed her with perfume n gave her some christmas sweets.. i felt so good.. the joys of doing things for other ppl..
then we had family over n christmas lunch.. n gift opening session.. happiness.. Then.. the best part.. i settled for the rest of the evening watching movies alone one after another on the couch with my blanket n comfy sweats, eating kulkuls (my fave) with only the lights of the christmas tree on.. oh joy..
(n im not being saki)
just looking at that tree makes me happy..
There was a time when i had mentally listed the things that make me happy.. i forgot all about it cause for a while, nothing made me happy.. nothing at all.. but im outta there now.. im me again.. oh ill probably 'write' about the lil things that make me happy..!